Archive for August, 2006

Happy Birthday Rose

Friday, August 25th, 2006
Rosary,
I called Amy’s cellibone yester hoping to be regaled with exaggerated accounts of your gluttonous birthday celebration only to hear her deadpan monotone tell me that you had split following a rather brutal confrontation with Fin and a night of binge drugging (thanks in no small part to your increasingly irresponsible younger sibling) I thanked her for being there for you and scolded her for using Ecstasy to coax you out of your room when coke alone would have sufficed.
She tells me you’ve run away to Victoria, cause Corina is awful and a return to Cortes is impossible. Fine by me, but I just want to know you have a roof over your head and some one near who can take you up in their arms…
I love you and I’m worried. I’m also devastated that your birthday turned out this way, you deserve nothing but the best and for some reason God has it in mind to continuously drag you through the mud. Why? why oh why?
You know, and I keep getting down on my life and feeling like nothings working out but every time i feel like I’m sinking, the bottom just comes right out for you and my problems seem so small.
You should know I’m toying with the idea of becoming an art dealer, and travelling the world pimping out the artists I will represent, and you will be my star performer, so remaining sad will have it’s advantages…. so long as you can maintain production.
anyways please write me or call me to let me know you’re alright, and where you are. O.K?
I love you so much and if something bad happened to you, I’d die.
Love Alexandre.

Girls Gone Wild Part Deux

Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006
Beyonce.
Yes I think Beyonce has officially gone crazy, and not like: a lack of endorphins is pushing her deeper and deeper into depression or anything normal like that, more like she got bit by a tick when she was filming " Deja Vu", or Sasha, her alter iga, has full on taken over, or she’s being haunted and grandma Dorion is living in her head and telling her to drink blood.
Actually, I think what we are witnessing with B is merely the downside to, or backlash for having shed sacrificial blood to the Voodoo charms she used to get to the top in the first place, and don’t think Latavia and Latoya don’t already know it. As for Mathew Knowles only time will tell. Beyoncesbday
I say all of this having just watched her latest music video on You Tube, "Ring the Alarm", if you haven’t already seen it, go to You tube and watch it. It tells the story of a psycho ex girlfriend (played by Beyonce… as she impersonates Sharon Stones Basic Instinct character) having various shit fits over the idea that if she "lets go" of her man who has quite obviously moved on with some other dame, someone will have to "ring the alarm." If you though she looked like a total spazz in "Crazy in Deja Vu" then Ring the Alarm will come as no shock.
What is shocking to me, or at least strange is that it seems Beyonce’s demure veneer has been shed only to expose a psycho jealous emotional wreck. The girl is a case and she wants us all to know. Either that or she realised that " Say My Name" was quite possibly her absolute best contribution to 21st century popular culture and she was trying, in some extreme and misguided way, to recapture that cheeky jealous sentiment. Well B or Sasha or whoever you are, I think you need to step back and try to look at this objectively. People thought Sharon Stone was sexy in Basic Instinct, because she showed her bush and did the wild thing with other chicks. And for the record, no one wanted to sympathise with bunny killing Glen Close in Fatal Attraction. If you’re looking for an Oscar you’re going about it the wrong way, you should get fat, do a convincing rape scene and fall in love with an ugly fat middle aged has been. If I’m wrong and all of this isn’t to prove you can act, well i don’t even know what to tell you, you need a new manager (but that’s been clear since the "Daddy I Love You" incident of 2003.) If your just too avant garde for me and ‘crazy lunatic’ is the new ‘loyal girlfriend’ my apologies and you can bet your life I’ll be jumping on that bandwagon, as my man can surely attest I am one spazz attack away from my own half quote title.
I guess the last question I have is: where is Jay Z in all of this? Jigga would never ever do something like this and you can bet your sweet ass he’d never let Tierra Marie do it either, he’s got way to much business sense for that nutso shit. He needs to tighten the reigns on his bitch, i mean boo, and caution her against the pitfalls of being that crazy bitch (he could start by showing her a line graph of Foxy Browns career vs. her nutty outbursts.
I guess I wish her the best of luck, and maybe one or two actually fun and non spazzy singles… cause i remeber thye times when "I liked to stare so deep in your eyes, touch on me more and more everytime" you know and when i used to "Picture us dancing real close in the dark dark corner of a basement party"